Funny Things


Friday, December 16, 2011

The Weekly To X - PROVOCATIVE TITLE: Genitals and Booze

Last week I finally figured out exactly what kind of title will draw the most people into a Top X.  I've tried jokes, strange literary references, making fun of Brent - to name a few.  But it turns out that you're all a bunch of damn drunks!

This week I'm combining in a new idea.  Or at least introducing it slowly.  

If you've made it this far, then I'm sorry to say that alcohol and naughty bits DO NOT play a pivitol role in this week's post.  It's a clever ruse, you see.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, " I don't feel bad"
But I probably should be careful.  If I cry wolf too many times, It'll all come crashing down. 

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Gaming on a Budget: The Crawnmower

The week of me discussing my the folder full of Magic the Gathering decklists I recently found on my lost flash drive from 2006 continues.  This time I'll be putting the Gaming on a Budget spin on it.

Oddly enough, this entire article was written over 5 years ago in its entirety (intro and minor editing notwithstanding), proving that a) mid-twenties dethtron is pretty much as big of an asshole as early thirties dethtron and b) I was a stingy miser even when I had a decent job.  


Wednesday, December 14, 2011

User Content Wednesday - Welcome to Malifaux: A 40k defectors guide

A looooong time ago, 40k for the New Professional had a different URL.  There was lots of great content including a very cool series about the interchange of ideas between IRL and the games we play.  Then Google ate everything without any explanation and he was never able to retrieve it.   It was a pretty sad day.  The House of Paincakes flag was flown at half mast.  But not the US flag since that'd be a little extreme.

Anyway, as you can imagine the wind kind of left the Kennedy's sails even with the registration of a new domain and for a fresh start.  What follows was always one of my favorite posts that was miraculously saved by Google Reader.  I hope re-posting this article, in some small way, puts some of the aforementioned wind back in the aforementioned sails of the aforementioned Kennedy.

Note:  Kennedy, I have a ton of your old stuff bunged away, so let me klnow if you need it.

So, a comment by SinSynn really sparked the idea for this post. After reading his comment about how he might "defect" partially, I had the thought that there are probably loads of you out there who might really like some information about how to actually start up in Malifaux. There's some stuff about it out there, but nothing terribly cohesive. Thus, I have taken it upon myself to write up something that might approach a guide to Malifaux.

I'll be starting really basic and moving forward from there, so feel free to skip ahead when you read something you already know.

An obvious first place to start is the basic premise. Malifaux is set in a steam punk wild west horror setting. Yeah, sounds weird at first, but it all fits, bizarre as that sounds. The game uses cards instead of dice to determine the effects. Typically, you engage in duels, where one of your piece's characteristics + the value of a card flip is pitted against one of your opponent's piece's characteristics + the value of a card flip. The difference in the result determines your victory (and the degree of success).

SinSynn: Totally a Fanboi


Hey folks, SinSynn here.

So when it comes to like, 'popular culture,' I'm probably not the most tolerant of Xenos.
I pretty much universally hate everything, for no good reason.
Whatever it is that the Normals are discussing around their water coolers, I'm usually dead set against it.

*Dancing With the Stars is amazing, but not as good as America's Got Talent!*


Like many discerning aliens, I'm a being of more refined tastes.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

The Angel of Discard

Next on the tour of MtG decks  that I randomly found on a flash drive I lost in 2006 is a little gem I've named "The Angel of Discard."  It, like most of my other decks, is built on a delightfully shaky premise guaranteed to frustrate opponents and put you on the list of people not to play against- well, if it works anyway.



Ok, so I like really obnoxious decks.  This shouldn't be a shocker, so sue me.  I tend to favor lots of dispel and thus gravitate towards Blue and Black .  During Ravnica block, though, I got seriously into discard and the horrifying possibilities of card advantage.  Trading a card for a card to dispel is all well and good, but ensuring that your opponent is losing even the possibility of casting that card is even better.  This all propelled me toward the twisted world of this Black and White Deck seen after the jump.

Tournaments - The Bad Side......

When I talk about tournaments to people who don't go to them I quite often get the same two statements thrown at me.....

1) I only play for fun

and,

2) I had a bad experience at 'insert name here' and It put me off.

The first one I'm going to completely ignore as I actually enjoy playing competitively so am most likely going to be having fun anyway.....however the second statement deserves some consideration.....

First we need to be honest with ourselves. Any event where a number of people are endeavouring to prove themselves superior to another group of people is going to attract the odd fuckwit. There are many people who validate themselves based on making other people miserable or who's sense of self worth is directly proportional to their own successes regardless of if these are at the expense of others.....if this wasn't true then there would never be anybody who wanted to go into politics or become a traffic warden.....


Monday, December 12, 2011

New Member Monday - Reading and Weeding

We've got a bit of a mixed bag this Monday - Sure we've got a new blog on the rolls, but we've also lost a few.

First up, our New Member:

GopherDave Abides... 
Keywords: Running a Game Store, Mostly pictures... with occasional words and deep thoughts...

For those of you who have been following Lo's weekly series, this is THE Dude she mentions all the time.  I think they're married or something...   If you've ever wanted some more insight into Lo's Musings of a Game Store owner, GopherDave's blog is the place to go.


Ok, that's the good news.  Now here's the inexorable and unyielding bad news.  We had to cut a few blogs from the rolls.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

dethtron Gathers All Your Magic, Sucks

I quit playing Magic the Gathering in about 2007 prior to Lauby and another friend of ours, representing the sum total of people I enjoyed playing MtG with, moved from the central coast to the east coast.  Given the local scene at the time here in Chicago, I simply couldn't deal with driving to my preferred in Niles to play against strangers whom I would most likely not enjoy being around.  Don't feel too bad for me, though, I went on to sell most of my collection and contribute significantly to the down payment on my house.

2006-7 also coincides with the loss of my trust Geek Squad flash drive, recently rediscovered in a random box of shit in my attic!  What was on that drive.  Well beyond a backup of some papers I wrote as in undergrad in the late 90's it had a folder with a few decklists that I was trying out during the Ravnica and Time Spiral blocks.  Some of my favorites from the time aren't in that folder.  It looks like I only had them in analog or apprentice form and lost those years ago.  I'll be sharing some of those amazingly terrible/insane decks with you all this week.  The fun never stops here at the HoP.

[Musings of a Game Store Owner] Introduction to Intelligent Design

Oh, that game is really great. I love it!

What makes it great?

And thus begins the trial and tribulation of my job, almost daily. Having knowledge and experience in a wide variety of games is an essential skill, but discussing them intelligently and with wisdom and forethought is even more important.